Got a call that our cat had died.... in that moment the blissful ignorance had subsided and the dread of reality kicked in. Mum was crying on the phone which was tough for me to hear but then I began to dwell on things as per usual, what it was going to be like back at home, those feelings of missing someone yet again, I find that part of life the hardest to stand because I tend to dwell on things deeply and my faith in life rolls away like a tide but the trouble is it IS a part of life.
My theory is that when we love something a part of us transfers over to the person we love, our hearts stay with them and when they pass away a part of us dies aswell, this kills me. In the rare moments when I feel like a father I can pour love out and look after anyone but whenever I do this I ache inside and maybe this is because I transfer some of myself to another and that part of me goes with them, who knows.
Thursday, 29 July 2010
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